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Let's Play Umineko no Naku Koro ni - Episode 2 Chapter 4
Episode 2 Chapter 4 – Trick or Treat
Rosa and Maria are on the train to get to the other train to get to the plane to get to the boat to get to Rokkenjima for the family conference. Getting across Japan sounds like a pain in the ass.
Maria's acutely aware that it's almost Halloween! It's not a super big thing in Japan, but it's her favorite holiday.
And she had the AWESOME idea of turning the whole family conference into a Halloween party but Rosa's being mean and won't let her! She's going to have to tantrum harder.
Maria that's... that's not what you... look up at the chapter title, Maria, I mean come on.
What a nice old lady!
But she's not helping.
They're physically playing tug-of-war with the candy. I think this is slowly becoming a scene.
Aaaaaand there it is!
Keep your fucking lollipops to yourself you old hag.
Oh yeah, crowded vehicle... uhhhhhhh...
There we go. This is a much less claustrophobic environment for wanton child abuse.
Jesus.
Rosa begins to calm down, and the total transformation reverts.
Maria has her way of coping. As far as she's concerned, there are just two versions of her mama. Her abusive side isn't the same person at all... it's all a dark witch's fault.
So Maria gets her Halloween candy after all. It's gonna make them late, they should be getting on the second train now... But fuck it. She owes the kid one. Or ten.
Meanwhile...
Krauss is stressed out about work. Natsuhi wants to help him however she can.
Uh-huh. Seesaws. Nobody understanding his vision. Krauss's problems: definitely not competence-related.
...I... look, Krauss, no, you don't have to--
Please don't make this an extended metaphor.
Well. Okay. I guess we'll never really have to take Krauss seriously anyway, what's the harm.
Poor Krauss. No one will seesaw with him. That was the upshot of this, right?
Natsuhi can do one thing for him today.
Meanwhile! Genji checks up on the kitchen.
God Gohda loves cooking. Let's get some backstory on Gohda, shall we? About why it's so important to him to be able to lovingly prepare world-class meals for bored now! Everybody not on the island should be ready to catch the plane to Niijima now.
Don't tell me.
You fucking loser. He doesn't actually intend to surprise her; on their last date, he suggested that by the time of the next conference he should be in a strong enough position to ask her to marry him.
HE KNOWS. This is what Rudolf was actually doing for so long in the bathroom.
Survived, probably. I mean what??? But yeah, we know why she's late now.
Ah, antics.
For a little while now, a lot of lines get repeated verbatim from Episode 1. The message, in case it wasn't clear: so far, this fragment has been pretty much identical to the one from Episode 1.
I'm sure this mixup is plausible and adorable in Japanese. Anyway, Battler has to make a connection with Maria in a slightly different fashion. He notices her jack-o'-lantern candy!
It turns out small children love it when you steal candy from them???
Oh for god's sake.
Rosa got her two of those little treats, so she gives Battler one for real.
IT'S TRICK OR TREEEEEEEEAAAAAAATTTTT
Back on the island, Jessica and Kumasawa rap. As in form a rapport, not perform rap music. Jessica confesses that she gets a little spooked out about the legends of the island on the day of every family conference, for reasons of which she is unsure.
Everybody knows you've got special insight into Spooky Shit, Kumasawa. It's the way you act when Kinzo or Maria go off about it.
People have considered the island haunted for so long it used to be named for it, is what she knows.
~spoooooooooky shiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttttt~
EARLIER this episode is all over the place chronologically I mean damn.
While Rudolf is at work, he and Kyrie make plans for a romantic getaway of some unspecified variety.
Nothing we didn't already know. Rudolf's company is getting its ass sued off. Prospects look grim for winning. But they might be able to settle!
If they don't mind eating their own shoes for the next ten years, that is. Rudolf faces his executives. Anybody got any ideas for pulling an aircraft carrier full of money out of thin air?
They're so boned they'd be okay with Rudolf embezzling if it meant he could pay the settlement out of his pocket.
Again, we already knew basically what was up here. MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, HE NEEDS A LOT OF MONEY, RIGHT NOW!!
Back on the plane. Kyrie does not STRICTLY know about the lawsuit. Just that he wants to borrow money from dad or Krauss.
Let's go see Kinzo and Nanjo.
This, too, is the same.
(There are actually a lot of typos in EP2's translation.)
Pfft, Battler. Who gives a shit. Call him when it's BEATRIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCEEEEEEEEEEE and not before.
Magic, gambles, etc.
We skipped the boat! Everybody's on the island now.
PAUSE.
Let's check up on Purgatorio.
The fragment we've been watching all this time is laid out on Beatrice's tea table. It's their game board. They can stare down into it and move the people in it like pieces in a chess match. Or, really, more like a tabletop RPG at this point. Beatrice is the Game Master, so she controls everyone except piece Battler, who's controlled by player Battler up here in Meta World. Of course this is a valid alternate reality, not some kind of crazy simulation, so the pieces must always behave in-character.
Understandably, this is a little too much crazy bullshit for Battler to take in all at once.
But that doesn't mean he's not determined. Beatrice will weave another murder mystery in this fragment, and he's going to have to beat her if he wants the chaos to stop.
His winning condition: meticulously prove that every single crime she commits in every single game they play, even if they're at this for centuries, could be committed without magic. Her winning condition: make him give up.
This is kind of unfair!
To Beatrice. Battler Ushiromiya never gives up!
We'll find out about that.
Rosa and Maria are on the train to get to the other train to get to the plane to get to the boat to get to Rokkenjima for the family conference. Getting across Japan sounds like a pain in the ass.
Maria's acutely aware that it's almost Halloween! It's not a super big thing in Japan, but it's her favorite holiday.
And she had the AWESOME idea of turning the whole family conference into a Halloween party but Rosa's being mean and won't let her! She's going to have to tantrum harder.
Maria that's... that's not what you... look up at the chapter title, Maria, I mean come on.
What a nice old lady!
But she's not helping.
They're physically playing tug-of-war with the candy. I think this is slowly becoming a scene.
Aaaaaand there it is!
Keep your fucking lollipops to yourself you old hag.
Oh yeah, crowded vehicle... uhhhhhhh...
There we go. This is a much less claustrophobic environment for wanton child abuse.
Jesus.
Rosa begins to calm down, and the total transformation reverts.
Maria has her way of coping. As far as she's concerned, there are just two versions of her mama. Her abusive side isn't the same person at all... it's all a dark witch's fault.
So Maria gets her Halloween candy after all. It's gonna make them late, they should be getting on the second train now... But fuck it. She owes the kid one. Or ten.
Meanwhile...
Krauss is stressed out about work. Natsuhi wants to help him however she can.
Uh-huh. Seesaws. Nobody understanding his vision. Krauss's problems: definitely not competence-related.
...I... look, Krauss, no, you don't have to--
Please don't make this an extended metaphor.
Well. Okay. I guess we'll never really have to take Krauss seriously anyway, what's the harm.
Poor Krauss. No one will seesaw with him. That was the upshot of this, right?
Natsuhi can do one thing for him today.
Meanwhile! Genji checks up on the kitchen.
God Gohda loves cooking. Let's get some backstory on Gohda, shall we? About why it's so important to him to be able to lovingly prepare world-class meals for bored now! Everybody not on the island should be ready to catch the plane to Niijima now.
Don't tell me.
You fucking loser. He doesn't actually intend to surprise her; on their last date, he suggested that by the time of the next conference he should be in a strong enough position to ask her to marry him.
HE KNOWS. This is what Rudolf was actually doing for so long in the bathroom.
Survived, probably. I mean what??? But yeah, we know why she's late now.
Ah, antics.
For a little while now, a lot of lines get repeated verbatim from Episode 1. The message, in case it wasn't clear: so far, this fragment has been pretty much identical to the one from Episode 1.
I'm sure this mixup is plausible and adorable in Japanese. Anyway, Battler has to make a connection with Maria in a slightly different fashion. He notices her jack-o'-lantern candy!
It turns out small children love it when you steal candy from them???
Oh for god's sake.
Rosa got her two of those little treats, so she gives Battler one for real.
IT'S TRICK OR TREEEEEEEEAAAAAAATTTTT
Back on the island, Jessica and Kumasawa rap. As in form a rapport, not perform rap music. Jessica confesses that she gets a little spooked out about the legends of the island on the day of every family conference, for reasons of which she is unsure.
Everybody knows you've got special insight into Spooky Shit, Kumasawa. It's the way you act when Kinzo or Maria go off about it.
People have considered the island haunted for so long it used to be named for it, is what she knows.
~spoooooooooky shiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttttt~
EARLIER this episode is all over the place chronologically I mean damn.
While Rudolf is at work, he and Kyrie make plans for a romantic getaway of some unspecified variety.
Nothing we didn't already know. Rudolf's company is getting its ass sued off. Prospects look grim for winning. But they might be able to settle!
If they don't mind eating their own shoes for the next ten years, that is. Rudolf faces his executives. Anybody got any ideas for pulling an aircraft carrier full of money out of thin air?
They're so boned they'd be okay with Rudolf embezzling if it meant he could pay the settlement out of his pocket.
Again, we already knew basically what was up here. MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, HE NEEDS A LOT OF MONEY, RIGHT NOW!!
Back on the plane. Kyrie does not STRICTLY know about the lawsuit. Just that he wants to borrow money from dad or Krauss.
Let's go see Kinzo and Nanjo.
This, too, is the same.
(There are actually a lot of typos in EP2's translation.)
Pfft, Battler. Who gives a shit. Call him when it's BEATRIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCEEEEEEEEEEE and not before.
Magic, gambles, etc.
We skipped the boat! Everybody's on the island now.
PAUSE.
Let's check up on Purgatorio.
The fragment we've been watching all this time is laid out on Beatrice's tea table. It's their game board. They can stare down into it and move the people in it like pieces in a chess match. Or, really, more like a tabletop RPG at this point. Beatrice is the Game Master, so she controls everyone except piece Battler, who's controlled by player Battler up here in Meta World. Of course this is a valid alternate reality, not some kind of crazy simulation, so the pieces must always behave in-character.
Understandably, this is a little too much crazy bullshit for Battler to take in all at once.
But that doesn't mean he's not determined. Beatrice will weave another murder mystery in this fragment, and he's going to have to beat her if he wants the chaos to stop.
His winning condition: meticulously prove that every single crime she commits in every single game they play, even if they're at this for centuries, could be committed without magic. Her winning condition: make him give up.
This is kind of unfair!
To Beatrice. Battler Ushiromiya never gives up!
We'll find out about that.