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Episode 3 Chapter 7 – Kanon Makes Lots of Mistakes

The first twilight still hasn't actually taken place yet, but it's midnight, so it should be here presently.

This is a much less poetic idea if you don't generally use military time, Kinzo. To the extent that it's not a little silly anyway.

Kinzo's brand of magic, much like everything else about him, is fueled by doing whatever he wants and not giving a fuck.

Or, to be more generous, it's about determination and probability. He thinks everything in the world is a matter of chance, so magic is what happens when you defy the odds. But, still. He's been trying this for a long time. It's pretty obvious what that means.

He's as good as dead. Meanwhile...

That shit happened again. She accepted, of course, and now she's all anxious about it. Because marriage will surely remain chief among her concerns.

Probably Kinzo's planning something up in the study and needs help.

That is easily the most Genji has ever emoted.

I wonder what would happen if she just tried scratching the paint off with a nail file or something. Either way, it won't be necessary now.

Now you've lost the element of surprise if Beato is in there. It would have improved your odds of hassling her slightly by 0.000002%.

LET'S ~~KICK~~ CAUTIOUSLY INVESTIGATE SOME ASS

Still alive? Then why not respond when they asked at the door? You're a rude man, Kinzo.

It's definitely Nanjo. In drag.

Genji and Ronove know each other very well. Presumably they went to Excellent Butler School together.

In fact, Kanon is the only one who doesn't recognize him. Strangers don't improve Kanon's mood. Especially ones in Beatrice's employ.

Well, five to go for tonight. And she seems to have three witnesses right here, now...

In the name of sportsmanship, or at least some perversion of it, Beato took the time out to make short work of Kinzo in a round of chess before killing him.

Checkmate.

Ah, roast ham. She does enjoy burning the guy alive, doesn't she?

So. Next?

Shannon, look. WAY too late for that to be a factor.

As gracious as a category five hurricane.

Give the boy a prize.

Why else? It's not like Kinzo would have wanted them to defend him, even if that weren't laughably impossible.

Now that Kinzo's dead and Beatrice is here to reclaim ownership of the family, she's inarguably the rightful master of the furniture.

And Genji is an exceptional butler.

Thinking about it, she's probably starting off this game with the six most oft-suspected people—Kinzo and the servants—specifically because Battler will have to give up on the nineteenth person hunt. Gotta play hardball.

Shannon is an exceptional sufferer.

But she can still sass the new mistress in her last hours.

Shannon doesn't have to work very hard to get a poorly-hidden rise out of Beato. For a thousand-year-old, she's embarrassingly better at dishing it out than at taking it.

She has easier targets, though!

What I recommend, Kanon, is that you do exactly what she explicitly wants you to do, which is get mad and try to fight.

Beato summons some more of her own furniture.

Kanon, do you recognize this behavior of Beatrice's? It's called lying.

A toddler could spot the catch in this deal.

But wait no let me guess.

Kanon is not the cleverest chair in the carpenter's shop.

Hey remember that time Asmodeus and Satan destroyed you effortlessly?

But enough thought! Have at thee!

I'm not going to in any way bother trying to awkwardly recreate the very long series of sound and visual effects for their swordlocusthings swinging and clashing. Suffice it to say, Lucifer's taking a lot of fast swings and Kanon's taking a few heavy ones.

PAUSE.

They're just talking over the fight now.

Beato is escalating her willingness to repeatedly have extremely magical things happen on the gameboard, visibly.

UNPAUSE.

Lucifer's... actually... not... winning.

Wait what was that about furniture becoBACK TO THE FIGHT

Unfortunately for Lucifer, pride is kind of her thing. And after one last volley of attacks...

Checkmate?

I bet Lucifer responds wonderfully to the criticism and mockery of her superiors. Of course, she can't take it out on Beato or Ronove, nor would she want to, nor would she dare. But maybe the person responsible!

Why fight when you can use your...

...ineffective special attack. But as for Kanon? How rude, this is the master's study.

Most of her sisters would have shouted that they were going for the heart, then attacked some other place. Not Lucifer, though. She's got too much, you know, what's the word?

Cockiness.

This is a pretty nasty wound, regardless, but Lucifer only had one shot to inflict something fatal. And she blew it.

Kanon wins!

Kanon is the winner!

Yes, truly, the furniture that could once only defeat a goat with some difficulty has achieved a stunning victory.

[BGM: nighteyes]

In round one. If you saw that coming before the fight even started, NO SHIT.

[SFX: ahaha.wav]

Lucifer bills herself as the leader of the Stakes.

Her sisters think that's a funny joke.

She's probably the weakest of the lot.

And the others are absolutely astonishingly vicious to her whenever she (often) fucks something up.

And, as big an advantage as Kanon seemed to have over just her, she still took one of his arms out of commission, leaving him far weaker than when they started.

Now he has to fight the other six.

[BGM: Demise_VerC]

All at once.

Gettin' real tired of saying “I told you so,” Kanon.

[SFX: ahaha.wav]

Here goes something REALLY PAINFUL

They're toying with him.

Which gives Shannon time to do this. “This” being buying him a very small amount of time, I'd imagine. Her barrier couldn't hold out even under better conditions in the last game.

Aren't your stake forms making enough noise bouncing around the room without you all talking?

Well. Now they're both going to die extra painfully.

Beato doesn't like Shannon's courage.

Something about Shannon being happy drives Beatrice more insane than anything.

All Shannon and Kanon did was defend themselves and those close to them. Chosen to be sacrifices or not, they deserve better than the bloodbath to come.